Mfonobong Inyang: The Encore Metaphors of Ahab, Jehu and Jezebel – An Outpost’s Perspective

Before CCTVs, drones and high-grade surveillance tech were invented, people secured places by putting watchmen on towers so they could see any potential danger coming. Every great watchman had certain qualities: visual acuity, physical stamina, institutional/historical knowledge and perhaps, most importantly, skill in communication so that he could properly describe what he saw in precise language. In a nutshell, his JD is to provide actionable intelligence. Today, there are no watchtowers but watchmen are still staying on guard.

It sounded far-fetched when I wrote this commentary last year but these days, such are the top indictments on the archetype of Ahab: “He’s Manchurian; an intelligence asset of the enemy. Otherwise, why would he enter into a pact with Ben-Hadad, a son of perdition, who seeks to destroy everything good about his country? Dumb, right? Isn’t that clearly against the collective strategic interests, national security or even foreign policy? Ahab is no patriot; he will gladly forgive those who are hell-bent on destroying the homeland and let them walk scot-free but send out his armies against law-abiding citizens. He is a self-preservationist, he will pay any price to remain in power, no matter how reprehensible – even to the point of sabotaging his people.” Remember this paragraph? I guess it aged quite well.

No pun intended, Ahab is the king of cancel culture. He claims to be a fighter for freedom until you disagree with him. Then he sends the media mob against you and suddenly, they call you a bigot, extremist, racist, sexist, conspiracy theorist and the vilest adjectives. The nerve to challenge the matrix doesn’t come without consequences; that explains why when people see you stand up against Ahab, they are surprised – not at what you’re saying because they know it’s true but at your chutzpah (audacity). Challenging Ahab is not child’s play. Your cred has to be on lock because God help you if Ahab and his surrogates have any funny receipts on you, you will hate yourself.

A strong leader is important, someone that can talk to the opps for you. Ahab isn’t just a sleazebag, he is also a wimp – he simply doesn’t have that main character energy. He tries to get an orchard, but instead of doubling down on the art of the deal to achieve his goal, he goes home and whines to Jezebel who helps with the wetwork. Elijah lays the smackdown on Ahab and his prophets but instead of taking his L and keeping it moving, Ahab does what he does best; he gets Jezebel to headhunt Elijah. The old fox was never the big guy, he was just the fall guy. What more proof do you need to believe that Jezebel heads the deep state? Ahab cannot win a free and fair fight; I am familiar with his game – he cannot fool me. He went into battle with Jehu and not only did he recruit Jehoshaphat to help him out and take the fall for him, he disguised himself to avoid any occupational hazard. Such a snollygoster. How can someone who always talks a big game weaponise the battle to take out his rival? Thank God Jehoshaphat folded. Let’s go, Ahab.

Ahab is owned. That’s how he maintains his good guy façade because he gets others to do the dirty work for him; he’s actually the gaslighter-in-chief. His PR game is wild because Jezebel might be many things but she is very competent with running the media machinery. Jehu is his own man and he is very hands-on, which means that he will inevitably have his hands dirty at some point. That’s not me endorsing it, that’s me explaining it. So it’s kind of a choice between someone who looks good but is bad and someone who looks bad but is good. Don’t take my word for it, ask yourself between Jehu and Ahab, who helps you and who hurts you on a personal level. Don’t just imagine some supposed existential threat out there, decide on the experiential threat to your interests. Don’t just believe any spin from talking heads on television; just believe the evidence of your own eyes and ears.

Never underestimate the ability of Ahab to screw things up. I didn’t just call out Ahab over his immigration politics, I also called out the endgame behind it. I don’t even need to comment on his muppet economics. Everyone is feeling the bite of his tomfoolery. I even called him out on his foreign policy. What the hell was he thinking by going into a pact with Ben-Hadad? Fam, this Ben-Hadad dude is bad news. He’s the head of a death cult whose mission is to kill, steal and destroy anyone who opposes their devilish agenda. Ben-Hadad’s wet dream is the destruction of the homeland and its civilisation as we know it and here you have a supposed leader who swore an oath to defend the homeland and its interests, providing aid and comfort to a top adversary. Doesn’t Ahab know that Ben-Hadad plays the long game and that this pact only kicks the can down the road? Such a decision is as dumb as believing that there exists a universe where chickens would ever vote for Christmas. Notice how the media is silent as Ahab sells out his own people? If it were Jehu, they would be throwing words around like treason but Ahab gets a slap on the wrist per usual. This is why I call Jehu a patriot because for all his flaws, he would never betray the homeland.

One thing Ahab does well is playing identity politics yet he accuses others of what he is guilty of. He uses his skin to cover his sins. He weaponises the groupthink sentiments to make you believe he is one of you while actually destroying you both individually and as a collective. At the bottom of the food chain, the conversation is about identity politics. That’s why Ahab is obsessed with keeping people poor, not just in their pockets but also in their minds so that they cannot see beyond primordial and pedestrian sentiments – he does just enough to quiet you down but not enough to make a difference. What people on the plantation are hungry for the most is not food; it is freedom – those who have woken up in their minds have figured out that charity is another control word. At the top of the food chain, we discuss interests, not identity. Choices are more fluid on this level of thinking.

For some people, they think this is about the personalities of Jehu and Ahab but for some of us, we are interrogating the respective agendas they represent. The truth is that both Ahab and Jehu are flawed individuals; so technically, I am not rooting for Jehu. I am only rooting for a counter-agenda; people want to worship God – not the government. This is how I know there will be a great awakening and more people will choose “policy over personality”. Not all of us are Jehu fanatics; those people exist but not yours truly. Co-signing Jehu was never on my bingo card. I remember saying, “I am not even his biggest fan”. Maturity is when your revelations become superior to your emotions. If I had another choice, I would move differently but if the options were Jehu and Ahab. Based on the intelligence available to me now, I will go with Jehu every day of the week and twice on Sunday – not forgetting public holidays.

This is not about Jehu, he is only the face of a movement. When Jehu faced Ahab, the emissaries Ahab sent to Jehu aligned with him instead – that’s why you see a weird realignment and broad coalition around Jehu. When Jehu faced Jezebel, it was the eunuchs at her castle that pushed her down. Jehu’s role as a patriot was just to harness the energy of the silent majority who loathe the state of play. Jehu will clean the house like you have never seen before, this is why the swamp hates him with a passion because he is not a puppet like Ahab.

They tried to take Jehu out of play but the man prevailed; I feel like they wanted him dead but couldn’t pull it together. He’s got a price on his head but there’s a risk to collecting it; somehow he out-foxed every box they tried to throw him in. Jehu might be here as a vessel to teach people a lesson. Jehu is coming with fire and fury, his chariot is driven by the whirlwind – winter is coming for House Ahab. These are scary hours for Ben-Hadad because he knows that it’s madman o’clock and he will most certainly buy the farm. Jehu is not here for hopscotch, he don’t play. Anyone who messes around with the homeland will find out.