BN Book Excerpt: Gems Along The Way by Tunde Ayeni

It is important as we navigate our life’s journey, and as we fulfil our God-given destinies to keep account of our days. There are many ways to keep account of our days: making the best use of our time, taking advantage of the opportunities that come our way, and focusing on things that have eternal value. Another important way is to keep record of the lessons we learn in the course of doing important things in life. Keeping record of vital lessons serves as a reminder of the things we have gone through and the wisdom we have learnt from them. It also helps us to pass down a compendium of wisdom keys to the younger generation so that they can experience a smoother journey as they go about fulfilling their own destinies.

“We fall in love by looking but we can only stay in love by overlooking.”

The secret of long-lasting relationships is to have measured expectations and load your heart with seeds of forgiveness. We also need to demonstrate maturity by learning the virtue of overlooking offences. In every relationship, the closer the proximity we share, the more likelihood of offence. We don’t step on the toes of those who are far off but those who are near. As those offences occur, they tend to wear out love. These offences may eventually lead to separation or divorce, if people don’t learn to overlook them. Operate your love relationship with a big blanket to cover the faults of your partner. It doesn’t mean we sweep things under the carpet but focusing on every bit of wrongdoing will separate even best friends.”

“Life is like a journey in a bus; not everyone with you in the bus is going to the same destination.

When I was a younger pastor, I used to beat myself in the head and worry-sick when someone left the church I was pastoring. I would go to them, talk to them, and try to persuade them to come back. I would apologise thinking that I might have said something or did something that offended them. I never really succeeded in bringing them back. This made me worry a lot until I learnt this lesson.

Not everyone who started the journey with you will get to the end of the journey. People will come down when they get to their bus stops. It doesn’t mean that they are bad people but they have simply reached their own bus stops. The driver doesn’t plead with those who want to stop not to do so, neither does he park and cry because a passenger came down. Your job as a driver is to focus and make sure the bus gets to its destination.

You may meet obstacles on the way, you may have to change your route, and you may have to stop at the filling station to refuel but never stop driving until you get to your destination. My advice to other passengers in the bus is that don’t disembark because of someone else. You must know where you are going and know when you get there.”

It is better to allow your works to reply to your critics than to do so with the words of your mouth.

Life is full of critics and nay-sayers. These critics don’t give you a chance of success; they are like Samballat and Tobiah – they belittle your efforts, doubt your intentions, and underrate your capacity. They are like mockers who see you as feeble and your efforts as inconsequential. They sit in judgement over every move you make. The greatest mistake you can make is to try to engage them in discussions with the aim of changing their mind. This is futile because they will never change their mind.

Time is going whether we use it or not.

Time is a gift from God and we don’t know how much of it is allotted to each one of us. So we need to learn to use our time positively to affect humanity and eternity. We need to see each brand new day as a bonus and make best use of it. The Bible commands us to redeem the time or to make best use of the opportunities we have.

Don’t hold on desperately to those who want to leave

Our lives as Christians are hidden in God and our destinies are ultimately realised by the help of God. We know that God uses people to assist us in the processes but we must allow God to use whoever He chooses. Attempting to hold on to any man that wants to leave is an act of unbelief. Your only and greatest source is God. Holding on to any man desperately because of what you gain from them is actually idolatry and God is not pleased with this.

Don’t trample on people when they fall. You may soon need mercy too.

God is full of mercy and that is His attitude towards humanity. He doesn’t crush us when we fall. Rather, he extends His helping hand to lift us up. Even when Adam and Eve fell in the garden, He replaced their fig leaves with animal skins. He was kind to them even in their fall.

We saw Jesus did the same thing to the woman caught in adultery. He showed her grace and empowered her to go and sin no more. He restored Peter back to fellowship and He helped the unbelief of Thomas. The true mark of a spiritual man is that they extend grace and mercy to the undeserving. Jesus never bruised those who were struggling but He helped them to live triumphantly.


***

In eight strategic chapters comprising forty-nine lessons, Tunde Ayeni, in a very simple but profound way, emphasized that the ingredients for progress in life are not derived only from the main events of our lives but also from the lessons we learn along the way. 

The main events in our lives such as graduation, wedding, house warming, anniversaries, etc, are not the only building blocks for our growth. The materials for developing our lives are hidden in the fragments (Lessons we learn) we gather along the way. As good as the five loaves and two small fish are, they can never fill your “twelve baskets”. The lessons are not just about what happened but they are hidden in the fragments we gather. We will witness many landmark events as we grow older but if we are going to apply our hearts to wisdom, we will not just focus on the events but on the important things that we fill our “baskets” with.

Gems Along The Way is a compendium of wisdom nuggets founded upon the scriptures, whose application covers marriage, relationships, ministry, career, leadership, finance, decision making, destiny matters, spiritual truths and much more. These timeless wisdoms have been compressed into capsule form for easy assimilation and application. You can purchase the book on Amazon and on Okada Books.