Olajumoke Awosemo: Our Yoruba Men or General Cheating Demons?

If you are Nigerian or strongly affiliated with the Nigerian related social media news, then you may have noticed the recent trend of pictures and memes directed at Yoruba boys on Twitter, Instagram and other social media platforms. The most usual allegations against these boys are those of cheating, lying and other terrible manly characters you can imagine.

I have no idea how and when this trend began, but it seems like it has become an established fact that Yoruba boys are relationship demons. I find some of the memes hilarious, but do I think that these allegations are true? Perhaps and maybe even perhaps not! Are Yoruba boys the only boys who lie and deceive girls? Definitely not!

The question then is – why are Yoruba boys suddenly labeled as cheats among all the boys of the numerous tribes in Nigeria? What has tribe got to do with cheating? If a man would cheat, he would – regardless of who he is and where he is from.

No woman can claim to 100% be able to spot a man who is prone to infidelity at a first glance but sometimes the telltale signs are glaring at us but we often choose to ignore or be oblivion to these signals.

I am in no way generalizing; but let’s take a look at this list of men who might have a roving eye or worse:

The one with the influencing pals
A recent survey on 200 cheating and non-cheating husbands revealed that 77% of cheating men have a good pal who has also cheated. Some male BFFs give in easily to the temptation to cheat because that is what their friends do. However, I will be careful not to judge a guy by what those around him do, but then I would not underestimate the power of influence.

The night crawler
Exactly how late is too late for a guy who is married or in a relationship to stay out with his friends? How often is too often for such guys to go out? It is not advisable for a girlfriend to control or monitor her man about his whereabouts; but it is most likely that the more a guy goes on a night out with his friends (without you), the more he is exposed to the temptation of cheating.

The guy with power and status
Girls are often attracted to men who have power and status but there is a somewhat synonymous relationship between high status and infidelity. While it is attractive to be with a guy with power, class and status, it is also important note that because the guys usually have plenty of opportunities (through several public function) to meet various women, the temptation to cheat is often high.

The Sex Lovers (almost addicts)
This set of guys often advocate that sex and love are two different things. In their minds, they still love their women but they also wish to have sex with the other women. Such men are good at compartmentalizing feelings and would be able to separate their love for the wife from what they feel for the other woman. This then makes it okay for them to have the other woman, and plan not to get caught.

The social media brigade
Social media can definitely wreak havoc on your relationship. Research and evidences have shown that acute social media users are more likely to cheat on their partners. Men like this have the tendency to be secretive about what they are up to or where they are going, they get jumpy when you as much as touch their phones and usually have an empty message folder- cheater alert. They often say that men likes this are such good listeners and always want to know about you because he doesn’t want to reveal too much about himself anyway.

Any of the men from the list above could be from any tribe and this suggests that tribe has a very minimal influence on individual lifestyle. Our identities are totally different from the habits we imbibe as we carry on in life. However, I will call on my Yoruba brothers to attempt to redeem their damaged images by being the perfect gentlemen to their partners.

Photo Credit: Dreamstime